Monday, February 21, 2005


Guilt-ridden conscience

Good Morning world,
Good Morning Conscience,

In recent times, if I woke up so early in the morning with a restlessness, it was due to the many earthquake shivers that shook my bed early morning or my upset stomach. But today morning it was my conscience, the guilt-ridden conscience. It did not let me sleep most of my Sunday night and I kept dreaming about those days-before-an-examination which were like a nightmare especially because I wasn't prepared for the exam. My most peaceful sleep before an exam during school and college were the nights when I had slept after giving my 100% in the preparations. Rest of the 10 years were restless nights. Last night was one such night.

So here's a resolution and a promise to this morning, that I WILL give my 100% and finish my long pending, long postponed tasks, my exams. And the preparations start NOW......
Things to work on and their deadlines.

1. Sun Java Programming Certification - Deadline 30th April 2005 (non-extendable)
2. The MS-Access project for the consulate - Deadline 25th Feb 2005 (extendable to 26th Feb
under unavoidable circumstances).
3. The insurance claim fax and follow-up - Deadline 25th Feb 2005 (non-extendable)
4. Close-off of insurance contract and dispatching the company material - Deadline 25th Feb
2005 (non-extendable)

In addition, to straighten-up life and avoid further guilt ridden conscience, things to get disciplined on:

1. Pursue work-related learning and give exemplary results at work - Deadline 30th March
2005 (non-extendable)
2. Resume Squash and Gym - No deadline, routine and mandatory part of the day.

Things to stop with immediate effect:

1. Lunch-time PC games till 30th April 2005- as it effectively takes away 1.5 hours of useful
time and may prove as a hurdle in pursuing the above deadlines.
2. Smoking - Its getting addictive, distractive and takes away quite an amount of the productive
3. Drinking till 30th April 2005 - as it has started affecting short-term memory which could
affect the exam preparations and also results in wasting the precious weekends.

Meeting these deadlines and getting over these tasks should give me that High that I have experienced a zillion times before, nothing tastes better than success. Last thing I want is the guilt again. Thanks to the laid-back-attitude and not listening to the conscience, I have done 4 significant mistakes already which has left a burden of guilt throughout my life and I do not want this number to become 5, do I ?

So, GO GET IT !!!

Remember your motto of life:

1. What a mind of a man can conceive, a man can achieve.
2. Always have a backup plan ready.


Thursday, February 17, 2005


Where have I been ?

Was right here...Checking my own blog as well as religiously reading all my other favourite blogs everyday. But was too busy to post anything. Ironically, my earlier post( the only one so far) mentioned I have plenty of time at hand, and then wroooooooom, I didn't have any. This is an attempt to discipline and organize self to make sure I post regularly here and slowly move towards creating my own website.

Meanwhile, can somebody educate me on how do I BlogRoll other bloggers links on my blog ? As of now I have saved them under my favourites but like the idea of Blogrolling.



Tuesday, September 07, 2004


Popping up

After a year of reading several blogs and revisiting them pretty often, I finally got down to writing my own posts in my own blog.

What stopped me so far from doing this ? Why a blog ?

Plain lazy. When I wrote my first essay in primary school, I was amused at how good it felt to pen down your thoughts. Years later, essay writing became a hobby clubbed with sketching and painting. Music came in as naturally and before I knew I could handle the flute as comfortably as the pen. Expressing your thoughts, emotions, imagination and just letting it out in a crystal clear form instead of letting it sink in and dissovle with time, caught my fancy. Everytime I expressed myself in either of these ways, I had a better clarity of thought, and a rejuvinated happiness to see things clearly. I had just found an alternative to star gazing maybe :).

Years later, in the hostel at university, speech, words became more dominating as I was surrounded with hundreds of people everyday writing, music, took a back seat. It was often done only in moments of distress when I was searching peace. Writing a diary never appealed to me somehow.

Years later, I find myself in a stage of life, where I have time for sports, music, family, creativity and writing :-). Been thinking of the best place to write and blog appeals to me finally. Cause I believe in learning and unlearning from things, every day has been a new day for me always. I contemplate and analyse a little too much. I have been reading so many blogs in the last year and also the comments, and i always find it good to hear other perceptions. So well, lets hope i am not lazy anymore and continue what I always wanted to do, writing....

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